You do not need to be in crisis to start counselling, and you do not both have to come. Most people who book are simply tired of having the same conversation.
Counselling is a regular appointment with someone trained to listen for what is underneath what you are saying, and, crucially, someone with no stake in the outcome. That last part is why it works when talking to a friend has not.
Eight areas, one standard of checking
Marriage, unmarried couples, separation and divorce, family conflict, abusive relationships, single parenting, siblings and friendships. Every practitioner listed under any of them has had their registration confirmed directly with BACP, UKCP or NCPS, and holds current professional indemnity insurance.
What to expect
Fifty minutes, usually weekly, in person or online. Most people notice something in the first three or four sessions; six to twelve is a common length of work. Nobody will ask you to commit to a course before you have met.
Choosing someone
The evidence is consistent that the single biggest factor in whether counselling helps is whether you get on with the person. Fees and availability are on every profile, so you can compare before you make contact, and it is entirely normal to try someone else if the first is not right.
One exception
Where there is abuse in a relationship, joint counselling is not recommended and can raise the risk of harm. See abusive relationships.